Jakarta

We flew into Jakarta in Indonesia and spent a few days seeing not much at all. Jakarta is quite a strange place, within sight of high rise financial buildings are areas of complete waste ground where the poorest people in the city live.

The only real sight we went to see was Jakarta‘s old town. Though there wasn’t much to see as most of it seemed to be closed and falling down we still had quite an eventful visit. We tried visiting a café on the edge of the main square but it seems than even in Indonesia if a place has been visited by the Dutch royal family then it will still be too expensive for us!

Whilst we were walking around the main square in the old town we heard some commotion going on from one corner. Of course being on a development plateau level with high school children we rushed over to surround what was going on and chant “FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT”. Well we may not have actually chanted but we did want a better view. It seemed that a group of teenage has aggravated a stall owner somehow and they were now facing off in the street. The face off quickly turned into a throwing competition with bottles, sticks and metal poles flying up and down. Eventually the kids ran away and after following the crowd for a bit we realised that they weren’t going to be found again.

I was going to claim that we saw the national monument but Pete tells me it doesn’t count if you only take a picture as you fly fast in a Tuk Tuk. Talking of driving round in Tuk Tuks, even after going through all of Asia the driving in Jakarta was the most crazy we had witnessed and their Tuk Tuks were the funniest looking.

The main reason we didn’t get to see much else was because we were having such a hard time trying to book our tickets to get away from there. In the end we managed to sort ourselves with the aim of going to a volcano, Mt. Bromo, that you can usually climb to the rim of at the eastern end of Java.

Singapore

Leaving Malaysia we managed to get back to our old near missing transport ways. For some reason we decided that we had time to get a fried breakfast before setting off to the airport. We didn’t. when we got there the sign said that check in had closed but we decided to go to the desk anyway. Luckily they hadn’t yet put the sign up so they let us check in with just over half an hour until take off. The queue for immigration didn’t look too long so we figured we were in the clear but then it became obvious that this was the slowest immigration procedure ever! After 10 minutes we were finally at the front of the queue and then had to push in for the final baggage scan and run to get on with 5 minutes to spare, now that’s efficiency.

Relieved to have made it onto the plane when we arrived at Singapore we thought nothing of being asked to let them scan our bags again. After the scan the customs officer asked if I had anything to declare, I told him no to which he replied “so you don’t have any ammunition cases in your bag”…. fuck. We spent nearly 2 hours in an office giving statements, talking to police etc then were finally let go minus one souvenir from Vietnam.

We spent most of our time looking around the city with our fantastic hosts and tour guides Sarah and Jorge. First impressions of Singapore is that it is constantly redeveloping. For example we were told that a bridge that crosses the river near to a new botanical gardens is to be taken down and replaced with a tunnel, just because that would look nicer! it was nice to finally be in a place that had a very western feeling for the first time in about 4 months! It is also quite a heavily supervised place with CCTV an even more common sight than at home.

By the coast in the city (and right next to the Grand Prix track pit straight) is the worlds largest observation wheel which we took a trip on.

When Sarah and Jorge had to work after the weekend me and Pete went to Santosa island, accessed by cable car off the coast of Singapore. The island is basically one big amusement park. Whilst most of it is still being developed we had a great time on the luge ride that involves driving a little car down a concrete track. Tickets to use the ride also include a ticket back up the hill on a cable car so no walking like suckers.

Malaysia

The journey to Malaysia was actually pretty nice in comparison to some that we had been doing recently. The worst part was that we had to go 5 hours across the same part of Thailand 3 times in less than 2 weeks. When we finally arrived in Kuala Lumpur we got to our room and realised it wasn’t in the area where we wanted to stay and it was utter shit. In our first evening there we first managed to find a new place to stay and then went out and drank expensive drinks all night.

Most of Kuala Lumpur was pretty disappointing really. We had to go electronics shopping which took most of our first day and then another few hours the day after due to our great indecisiveness and the overwhelming size of the shopping centre we were in; 6 floors of shops selling just electronic goods.

We when we were done with electronics shopping we went up to the PETRONAS towers to try and go up them. Unfortunately they are so busy that you have to buy a ticket to come back later, when we were there at 10 all the tickets for the observation deck for the day had been sold and tickets to the bridge halfway up were sold out until 4! We decided it was something we should do so we bought the tickets and came back later. 

In the time we were away the weather changed from clear blue skys to a massive storm. This meant we could see exactly nothing from the bridge! On the way back we realised the water level in a storm drain had risen about 4 meters from almost nothing to a raging torrent! 

On our last day there we went to a park a small walk from our hotel and then Pete got a tattoo in a shopping center that also boasted a roller coaster.

We got around Kuala Lumpur mostly using the monorail system which meant having the Simpsons monorail song stuck in our heads for 3 days. The best part of the monorail was that the line we took to get home terminated in a place called Titiwangsa, always good for a laugh.

Koh Phangan

We had another long spell travelling to get to Koh Phangnan as it was back on the east coast of Thailand and a bit further north. We spent all day on a coach that had definitely seen much better days, luckily as we were leaving the bus station there was a shop telling us not to panic in large friendly letters.

As we took all day to get to the coast, instead of taking a night in Surat Thani we decided to take the night ferry over to the island. The ferry was actually more like a cargo ship and on the top deck there was padding all along both sides for sleeping. Everyone was allocated a space about half a meter wide and luckily the sea was calm or it would have been a very uncomfortable night. The ferry arrive in the early morning just before sunrise and then we could begin the nightmare of finding a bed.

Accommodation was really hard to find especially since we were in a group of four having bumped into a couple of girls we met in Vietnam. We initially thought we had found a place but after waiting around for several hours and paying for a room we were told there was only one tiny bungalow available. We managed to find another place where we could share one extra large bungalow for a reasonable price. The only problem was the original place would give us our money back for the first night even though we couldn’t stay because they lied about having space for us! I ended up having an argument with the owner for about 20 minutes that ended with her calling the “police”. I decided it was probably best to leave at this point since the police would probably be a group of her largest friends! After that annoyance we went down to Haad Rin where the full moon party was going to be held and the toll the partying was taking on the beach was obvious. A beautiful white sand beach ruined by non stop partying, and this was 2 days before the full moon party!

We spent the next few days just hanging around and waiting for the full moon to arrive. The most exciting thing we did was to visit an underwhelming waterfall and get attacked by someone’s savage little pet monkey!

When the party finally came it was pretty spectacular. The sheer numbers of people on one beach was impressive and there were endless sound systems in and around the sea all along the beach. Drinks were sold by the bucket as you become accustomed to in this part of the world and after 2 full of gin and tonic the night becomes a little hazy! Luckily there was only one casualty for me; the camera that had taken such a beating had finally given up at some point in the night. Unfortunately for the girls we were sharing the bungalow with the same could not be said for them. Me and Pete arrived back at the place at around 7 in the morning to find it empty with just a note from them explaining they had gone to Koh Samui with a friend who had injured himself. It later turned out he had had a toe amputated after one of the girls convinced him to have a go on a slide at the beach. This worked out quite well for us as the room was already paid for so we had it all to ourselves until we left!

Koh Lanta

Our next stop was Koh Lanta that was just a ferry ride away from Phi Phi. We decided to go to have some quiet time before the full moon party the next week. We spent our first night watching the Manchester derby with about 20 Thai Man United fans in a local restaurant which was an interesting experience.

Our first day there we rented a couple of motorbikes to get around to more areas of the island. We went off in a random direction with no plan with two Canadian girls that we had met on the ferry coming across. We rode around for a bit to some deserted beaches and then followed a sign for a waterfall. After a while the road turned to a dirt track and then ended at a restaurant. From there we were told to walk into the jungle for a while and we would find the waterfall. The walk ended up being over half an hour over pretty tricky terrain at times just walking along a stream. Not what we were expecting but we imagined it would definitely be worth it. It wasn’t:

On Valentines day me and Pete had a lovely meal together on the beach (they didn‘t light the candle on our table though) to the accompaniment of every heartbreak song that you could think of, no wonder the restaurant was empty! Afterwards we went to a bar further up the beach and watched the barmen display their skill with various firery sticks, thankfully now in the company of the Canadian girls.

On our last day there we noticed that the sea had strange black patches about 5 or 6 meters long. Up close it turned out that the patches were huge shoals of small fish with the occasional larger ones circling. The picture below is me swimming through the middle of one of the groups, taken with Pete’s underwater camera.

One last thing to mention from Koh Lanta is the pictures on the cigarette packets. Most of them are much more brutal that the UK ones (even worse than throat cancer man) apart from the guy pictured below who seems to be demonstrating how smoking with a baby in your arms makes you look cool. 

One more one last thing, here is a picture of a weird bug, I'll be damned if I know what the hell it is!

Koh Phi Phi - 2 Tuk tuks, 2 coaches, 2 minibuses, a bus, a taxi an aeroplane and a ferry

The start of this blog is the story of the worst bit of travelling that we have done so far. We were up at 6 in the morning (after my last night sleeping in the bar) to take a Tuk tuk to town to catch our bus to Bangkok. Everything was going smoothly for about 2 hours... then one of the tyres disintegrated with a huge bang and we spent the next hour sheltering from the sun in the forest by the edge of the road.

Only being stranded for just over an hour is relatively good for Asia so we were still in a good mood when we set off again. This time we got as far as the border where we were transferred to minibuses for the rest of the trip to Bangkok. This was OK until, for no reason, the minibus stopped at a petrol station and drove away without telling us anything. Nearly an hour later we were told to get on another minibus (that had been sitting there all along) and we carried on. We finally arrived in Bangkok and the next step was a taxi to the airport, being such a simple task how could this go wrong? Easily. There are two airports in Bangkok and taxi drivers aren't that bright. Still this wasn't the end of the world we had time to kill and he took us to the right airport for no extra charge (once we had told him we wouldn't pay the extra charge). Then was time for the next disaster; the old Bangkok airport is not open 24 hours a day. There are no departures between 10pm and 6am so the airport closes for the night. Awesome if you are arriving at half 10 at night. Luckily one set of doors downstairs was still open so we could get in and sleep in the deserted place until our flight at 7. We even had our own personal security guard who came over and slept nearby!

In the morning the flight went without a problem and from Krabi airport it was just a case of taking a bus, a coach, a tuk tuk and then a ferry and we arrived on Phi Phi... simple as that, and it had only been 36 hours since we left Sihanookville! Things didn't get much easier on the island as we had to spend about an hour sweating our way around until we found a place to stay that wasn't fully booked. This place was a tiny box above a shop with only a double bed, cosy. Our accommodation was also just around the corner from the location pictured below. 

Looks like a beautiful, lush, green park... that's because it is the waste disposal area and so the plants are being well fertilised by the island's many tourists (check the "water" under the summer house thing). Unfortunately though the plants hide the visuals they do absolutely nothing for the smell. All in all our accommodation was so bad that moving the next day to a place called The Gypsy Bungalows was a huge upgrade.

The rest of Phi Phi wasn't too interesting really, we took a boat trip to do some snorkelling and to see the beach from The Beach. The snorkelling was quite good fun as the water was crystal clear but the beach that was the main attraction of the day was far too busy to be impressive. The most interesting part of the day was back at our bungalow, a random Thai man rode a push bike into the middle of the green area the bungalows were set around, pulled a chrome handgun and fired a shot straight into the sky. We asked the receptionist what the hell it was about but he just chuckled and ignored us!

On our last day there we realised that we had managed to lose the key during a drunken rampage the previous night involving a child's bike and a fire extinguisher. Anyway our way to avoid the lost key charge was to check out before returning to our room to quickly get changed. We then ran past reception when we were supposed to be giving our key back, a quick check to make sure the gun maniac wasn't following and we were free! 

Sihanookville

The night bus from Siem Reap wasn't all that bad, probably because I had drunk so much before setting off. The bus was due to arrive at about 8 in the morning so I was annoyed when the bus stopped at about half 5 and interrupted my sleep. Then I realised that we had actually arrived a couple of hours early. I took a moped taxi to the far end of town (after a quick stop to replace the bike which broke down halfway there) where Pete was staying. I arrived just after sunrise and nothing was awake and apparently wouldn't be for a couple of hours so I crossed the road (dirt path) to the beach and sat there staring at this until I could get breakfast.

The next 8 days I spent living in a small room above one of the bars on the beach front for only $5 a night. This was our holiday from a holiday and we spent pretty much every day lying on the nearly deserted beach and watching the perfect nightly sunsets. (This section of the trip is definitely going to help the blog catch up).

After the 8th day on the beach it was Chinese new year and my room had apparently been booked out whilst I was in it... again. Because of the new year everywhere else on the beach was also full so I ended up staying on a bamboo bed and being the night watchman in one of the bars over the road.

Sleeping there wasn't too bad apart from the animals the bar owned. They had two puppies and a kitten called ninja that spent all night fighting under my bed and up the sides of the mosquito net. As well as them there was also a chicken that had been hand reared on the bar from birth and so every night at sunset would jump to the back of one of the bar stools and sleep there for the night.